I have a dentist appointment this afternoon, to get my second permanent crown this year. Let this be a lesson to you internet–DO NOT WAIT FOUR YEARS BEFORE GOING TO THE DENTIST! Lack of insurance be damned–sleep with someone if you have to! Just get there!
Luckily for me aside from the astronomical costs associated with these types of procedures, I actually enjoy going to my dentist. In fact, I love my dentist and his dental assistant Janel. They are a veritable tag team of comedy. At my very first appointment (at 8:30 in the morning) I was sitting in the giant chair—waiting for the guilt trip I was sure was coming—when Janel came in and introduced herself. And then she said ‘Dr. Kemper will be in in just a minute. He’s just finishing up his martini.’ With a completely straight face. And that’s when I knew I was home.
And its only gotten better since then. T-Bone recommended Dr. Kemper* to me originally, but since she is an adult and therefore capable of appropriate oral hygiene, she’s never met Janel–only the lady who does the cleanings. She is very nice as well, it’s just that she’s never referred to her co-workers as monkeys, and that is the type of attitude I really enjoy from a person who’s job it is to put her hand in my mouth.
Which brings me to my point. My face. I am a 26 year old human. I’ve never had huge problems with my skin—a couple of ‘issues’ here and there, certainly the worst of which were during high school. So I ask you this: Why THIS morning? And why RIGHT NEXT TO MY LOWER LIP? I mean, it’s like my pores all got together in a dimly lit, smoky room to have a look at my calendar. Well, clearly there are no dates in the near future, so we can’t really do anything there…but wait! What’s this? A dentist appointment? Interesting…very interesting…And that is why I woke up this morning with not one but TWO tiny pimples right below my bottom lip. On any other day, it wouldn’t matter at all. They are so small, and situated in a way that you can’t really even see them. Unless you hover over my face, ask me to open wide, and then SHINE A LIGHT DIRECTLY ONTO MY MOUTH. You know, like at the dentist.
My pores better watch it. I know of a really good exfoliate willing to work for cheap.
*If anyone in the Seattle area needs a dentist that won’t make you feel guilty or a dental assistant that will make you laugh, please give Dr. Kemper’s office a call. Seriously. I LOOK FORWARD TO GOING TO THE DENTIST. And you can too.